Nostalgia

My uncle Bob passed away a few months ago, he was my favorite uncle. I got a box of pictures in the mail from my cousins, Mary and Carolee, about a week or so ago. Carolee and Mary had just spent the day going through pictures at their dad's house and thought I would like to have the old pictures to share with my sisters. I remember when my dad passed away, my sister and I sat at mom and dad's house and did the same thing. That was in 2001, mom had already passed in 1996 so there was just Barb and I going through our entire life in that house that was packed with memories and stuff but it felt empty. The two people who had made this a home were gone and all we were left with was the stuff. After mom passed, I grieved for a long time. Mom was my best friend, we talked about everything. Anytime I had a question about anything, mom was there. She hardly ever gave me advice, she wanted me to figure it out but if I had a question about kids or cooking or baking, she was a wealth of knowledge. I grew closer to my dad, calling him every Sunday and going to see him every holiday and as often as I could get there. I was at work when I got the news that he was gone, I left work and never went back. It took me a couple of years to function as a normal person again. I honestly don't remember those couple of years. Actually, there are parts that I do remember, thank goodness for pictures. I thought I was doing pretty good for the past few years but evidentally I was wrong. My life is not what I thought it would be at the age of 51. I've had my real estate license since 1993, times are tough right now, I haven't had a sale in over a year. I will have to let my license go inactive for the first time in 15 years. It's okay, I guess, there are other things I can do.
Anyway, back to the pictures. I opened the box this morning and started to look through them. They were the pictures that grandma had and my Aunt Dorris had taken them to save. My life flashed before my eyes again, it reminded me of when Barb and I sat at mom and dad's house looking through the boxes of old photos. I saw myself as a tiny baby in the arms of my great grandpa Fjelstul. I saw me as a baby with my grandma and with my mom and with my dad and with my grandpa. I saw pictures of mom and dad as young people with their mom and dad andwith their brothers and sisters. There were lots of pictures of me and Barb with grandpa and grandma in Ridgeway at their house. There were pictures of dad as a baby and a young boy on their farm in North Dakota. I was us as a family, we had a good life. Each time I found a picture of my sister, Barb, as a little girl, I said outloud "Dork". Each school picture of her, her headband was down or she would just look dorky. I laughed out loud. It took me about 30 minutes to go through all of them, remembering times with each picture that I was in. Those were such happy times, I loved going to grandma and grandpa's house. When I got done going through all the photos I put them back in the box and set it in my lap. I was sitting in the recliner chair, I sat back, closed my eyes and started to cry. I miss my mom and dad so much. As I was sitting there crying, I said outloud to myself, "I miss you mom and dad, it's not fair, why did you have to go so soon"? I want my mommy and daddy back!